Family bonds across generations: what the Milan research on family relationships teaches us

A grandmother tells, for the hundredth time, how she met her husband at a dance. The teenagers roll their eyes — and still know the story by heart. Researchers at the Università Cattolica del Sacro Cuore in Milan would say that story is doing important work: it is one of the threads that ties generations together.

Who is behind the research

The Università Cattolica's Family Studies and Research University Centre has studied family relationships since 1976. For more than thirty years (1979–2011) it was directed by Eugenia Scabini, now Professor Emerita of Social Psychology. With the psychologist Vittorio Cigoli (1942–2022), she developed what they call the relational-symbolic model of the family, presented in English in their book Family Identity: Ties, Symbols, and Transitions (2006).

The key idea: the family as a bond between generations

In the relational-symbolic model, a family is not just a group of people living together. It is a bond between generations — between those who give life and care, and those who receive them — that carries meaning from one generation to the next.

According to Scabini and Cigoli, this bond rests on two symbolic resources: trust and hope. It has an affective side (care, warmth, belonging) and an ethical side (commitment, responsibility, fairness between generations). Families pass on more than habits: they pass on a sense of who "we" are.

What the research says about parents and teenagers

The Centre's researchers have also studied how family relationships shape the long road to adulthood (Scabini, Marta & Lanz, 2006). In one study of 279 families with a late adolescent, Elena Marta (1997) found that supportive relationships and good communication between parents and adolescents were linked to whether young people showed signs of psychosocial risk. As in most family research, this shows an association rather than proof of cause — but it points in a clear direction: the quality of everyday conversation with teenagers matters.

What it means at your table

• Tell family stories. How grandparents met, the time the car broke down on holiday, what you were like at their age.
• Invite grandparents to the conversation, at the table or on a video call — and let children ask the questions.
• Talk about the future too. Asking a teenager what they hope for says: we believe in you.
• Keep the line open with teenagers. Support and listening matter more than the perfect advice.

How it shapes the Kalmdix method

• Stories across generations. In When I was your age, the children choose a theme and a parent or grandparent tells a true story about it.
• Hope as a game. In Ten years from now, everyone imagines a day of their life in ten years — and a first step towards it.
• Teens as interviewers. In Interview a legend, a parent plays someone the teen admires; the Flip the interview challenge asks teens to ask their parents about their day.
• Parents share too. The private goal Share your own day asks parents to tell one real moment of their day, including a small difficulty.

Sources

• Università Cattolica — Family Studies and Research University Centre (overview, PDF). centridiateneo.unicatt.it
• Cigoli, V., & Scabini, E. (2006). Family Identity: Ties, Symbols, and Transitions. Lawrence Erlbaum. Publisher
• Scabini, E., Marta, E., & Lanz, M. (2006). The Transition to Adulthood and Family Relations: An Intergenerational Perspective. Psychology Press. Publisher
• Marta, E. (1997). Parent–adolescent interaction and psycho-social risk in adolescents: An analysis of communication, support and gender. Journal of Adolescence, 20(5), 473–487. Repository
• Eugenia Scabini — Academia Europaea profile. ae-info.org

Kalmdix is independent. The Università Cattolica del Sacro Cuore is not a partner of Kalmdix and has not evaluated it. This article summarises published research in our own words — read the sources for the full picture.

Frequently asked questions

What is the relational-symbolic model of the family?

A model developed by Eugenia Scabini and Vittorio Cigoli at the Università Cattolica in Milan. It sees the family as a bond between generations that rests on trust and hope, with both an affective side (care, belonging) and an ethical side (commitment, fairness).

Does communication with parents matter for teenagers?

Research by Elena Marta at the Università Cattolica found that supportive relationships and good parent–adolescent communication were linked to whether late adolescents showed signs of psychosocial risk. It is an association rather than proof of cause.